Recently, I’ve discovered that driving gets on my nerves. And not just the act of driving, either. I am annoyed by the entire process; settling in, checking for gas, traffic, all of it. Just a couple of days ago though, I traced my frustrations to one single habit. When I get in the car, I drop everything in the drivers seat before buckling in my baby in her car seat; in the 60 seconds between buckling her in and getting myself in, I have forgotten my driver’s seat is occupied until I open the door and – bam! – I can’t sit down. I’ve accidentally sat on my purse, keys, sunglasses more times than I care to admit. It only takes a little time to clear it out, but from that moment on, I’m still agitated. And it hit me; even though I’m driving the car, my agitation and frustration were still in the drivers seat. I realized that for me to feel comfortable, I need a space that I have left clear for myself to settle into. Dropping bags and belongings right where I’m standing is a short term convenience, but it doesn’t serve me. And it got me thinking; do I have this habit in other areas of my life? Do I drop my heavy stuff where I stand, even if it’s not the best place for it? And is leaving my heavy stuff where I stand adding to my frustrations? Is my heavy stuff…. still in the drivers seat? Ultimately, we all have to begin the habit of putting our things – and our feelings – in their proper place and context. It takes a little longer, but in the long run, what we are actually doing is creating a safer more comfortable space to operate from. Now will I create a whole new bag habit that will reshape my attitudes towards driving? Who knows. I am, though, trying to be more intentional about putting my things – both material and emotional – in their proper places, and if you ask me, that is growth.
Chrysallis Counseling 